With the Washington Post’s reporting that three other top former generals have already turned it down, the question must be asked as to how far President Bush will have to go down the ranks. And would he open it up to nominations?
We know you’re desperate, Mr. Bush, to appoint a “War Czar” with stature AND credibility but it’s time to get real. These other generals don’t want “the ulcer.” How about considering a lowly retired lieutenant colonel who got himself a little stature back in the early 1990’s getting his picture taken carrying the “nuclear football” for Ronald Reagan?
We in Minnesota’s 2nd District can all assure you that what John Kline lacks in rank, he makes up for in Gung Ho. Not only did he draft the recent letter to Nancy Pelosi fighting to continue the Iraq War on behalf of his group of other GOP Vietnam veterans in the House—a letter most probably devoid of those nasty facts on the ground in Iraq but full of venom for Jane Fonda and other congressmen veterans who developed more sober assessments of their Vietnam experience.
Not only is retired Lt. Col. Kline one of your most consistent top supporters in the House, legislation wise, somewhere around 95%. Not only did he clap for your “Mission Accomplished” performance but he’s been telling us of your “progress in Iraq” for over four years now. Even if other generals have “fundamental issues” about you not “knowing where the hell (you’re) going,” there’s no doubt that John Kline would follow both you and 5 time draft-deferred VP Cheney right into hell. What other true believer is still defending, with a straight face, your lying us into this unjustified war? Who never had one critical word about Donald Rumsfeld right up to the bitter end? Who else winks about your “surge” knowing it’s intended to be a long term escalation? And who else voted for and condones your construction of permanent military bases in Iraq?
No, Decider President Sir, unless you want to consider pardoning Duke Cunningham from his military contractor corruption conviction, you probably can’t find a more gung ho guy for that “War Czar” position right now. Ulcers and all. If you haven’t heard much about our Minnesota 2nd District Republican Congressman John Kline, just check with your right-hand man Karl. “Lifeblood of the Republican Party” Rove can certainly vouch for how quick study John Kline has been in following his cutthroat Rovian tactics. And, if you think about it, that propensity can’t hurt someone you want to become your new “War Czar” either.
Of course we’ll have to be honest here about our ulterior motives in making this recommendation. Your promotion of Kline from mere warhawk congressman to “War Czar” would also make many of us 2nd District Minnesotans happy too, happy to be rid of his heavy-handed tactics.
But on second thought, maybe this isn’t a good way to pawn him off. We can’t, in good conscience, wish John Kline on the rest of the country. It would probably be better if Bush’s “War Czar” position just stays vacant a while longer.
---DJK Staff Writer